"Saddened in New Jersey" (Oct. 2) complained that her sister's 4-year-old daughter put stickers on the hands and face of her deceased grandmother during her wake. Perhaps the child's mother didn't anticipate her daughter's actions. Children need to grieve, too. That said, they also should behave appropriately.
I saw an article about one funeral home with an excellent solution. Before the dearly departed is placed in the casket, the inside fabric, pillow, etc. are removed. The children are then allowed to decorate the uncovered casket walls with farewell messages and drawings. The interior is then "reupholstered" and nothing is visible. The children are told that it is to keep their messages private.
One story was particularly touching - a little boy wanted his mommy to know how much he loved her and for his message to be as close to her as possible. He wrote "I love you, Mommy" on the casket pillow that was placed beneath her head. At the service, only he knew about the secret message he had left for his mom for all eternity.